A guest post from social monsters:
Play Matchmaker This Valentine's Day
Studies published in the Social Psychology and Personality Science journal show chronic
Do you have friends that you want to get together but it seems like they could be an unlikely match? Another study shows the more unlikely the match, the more rewarding it is when it proves successful. So if you’re down in the dumps this Valentines Day, play Cupid to make yourself feel fantastic while helping someone else discover love.
Here are some ideas to get started:
Be a Good Listener
Listen to your friends and try to decipher what they’re really trying to tell you. When shesays, “I just want a good guy” press to find out what that means to her. Does she want someone loyal and hardworking? Or is she looking for a guy who is thoughtful and spontaneous with a history of great relationships?
Remember not every match is going to be a good fit. If you’re hearing your friend say she’s just not ready to date, then respect that. Offer to set her up on a casual date with someone fun that will take her mind off a past relationship or whatever is troubling her. Instead, match her up with a few great friends and help plan an evening out.
Offer a Personality Test
It can be tricky to tell if a couple is going to spark or not. Give yourself an advantage by sending them both a personality test. The idea is to look for traits the other finds attractive, not to necessarily match a couple up based on having a similar personality. While a test can’t determine personality, it can help determine the odds that a pair will hit it off or share an appreciation for each other. Couple the personality test with what you already know from this couple to make an educated guess about their chances for a love match.
Help Take the Edge Off
It’s okay to share a little inside knowledge about the couple without disclosing everything. Tell him about how she loves volunteering with animals and going on long walks through the city. Tell her about his appreciation for architecture and to look at which buildings are going up around town next. But don't interfere unless there's confusion after the date.
For example, she might think he's just not interested while he's crazy about her. And if the guy takes the traditional approach and asks out the woman, make a suggestion to get him a gift. Consider suggesting heartfelt gifts like chocolate dipped strawberries or a collection of his favorite teas to inspire fun and help give the evening a spark.
Matching up the perfect couple may offer the matchmaker a thrill, but can be stressful for the couple involved. Make it easy for them to say yes. Make suggestions about the date you know they would both enjoy or offer to organize it yourself. Look for interesting and fun events in your city where they can get to know each other like a jazz night at a local museum. Avoid plans where they have to make awkward conversation on their own with no reprieve of entertainment or distraction in sight.